????有時在商務談判中不得不采取強硬的態度。比如，老板要求你對付一個競爭對手，或者是應付一個難纏的客戶。這時，我們必須表現得像一名即將上臺的拳手一樣，占據主導地位，告訴對方我們絕不會讓步。

????然而實際上，專家指出，最佳的談判者不必表現出強勢態度也能獲得他們想要的結果。專業談判者稱，強勢態度或者憤怒情緒除了對個人健康以及工作場所的氛圍產生不利影響之外，還會妨礙人們取得希望看到的談判結果。

????沃頓商學院（Wharton）教授斯圖爾特?戴蒙德稱，不管怎樣，在談判中威脅或者責備他人都會對結果起到負面作用。他曾經寫過一本有關于談判的著作《贏得更多》（Getting More）。

????類似自尊心受到傷害這種主觀感受也可能會毀了一場談判。喬治敦大學麥克多諾商學院（Georgetown's McDonough business school）副教授克里斯?沃斯曾經擔任過美國聯邦調查局（FBI）的綁架談判代表。沃斯說：“即使一樁交易有很大的甜頭，他們也可能會拒絕。如果人們認為自己受到了不公平對待，他們會通過懲罰對方來獲得心理上的滿足感。”

????無論是否和對方意見一致，最好不要以可能會激怒對方的方式開始協商。戴蒙德稱，實際上，談判的實質內容對談判的成敗幾乎不會產生什么影響。比所談內容更能影響結果的是參與談判的人，他們的目的、想法以及他們對待彼此的方式。

????理智的談判者能讓對方感覺到自己的話有人傾聽，并以此來控制談判進程。戴蒙德稱，有一種很常見的錯誤想法：那就是，作為談判者，自己才是最重要的人。恰恰相反，談判者應該集中精力應對他們試圖要說服的那個人。即使對方的目的不切實際，但他們提供的線索常常能夠暴露出他們真實的想法。

????戴蒙德說：“我認為好的談判者能夠牢牢把握住那些明顯的線索。”人們在高壓力談判中很容易把精力集中在達成自己的目標上，但卻忽視了從對方的言行舉止中去捕捉有用的線索。

????沃斯稱，談判在某種程度上能夠操練情報收集的能力。他在美國聯邦調查局的工作經歷讓他領悟到了這一點。他現在成立了自己的黑天鵝（Black Swan）公司，為企業提供談判咨詢服務。即使在商務談判中，現場的情況也要比表面上看起來豐富復雜得多。比如，第三方常常會對談判產生影響。對于公司談判來說，最重要的是要知道，公司老板或者首席執行官是否會對談判代表施加影響。對此，可以通過幾種方法加以了解。當然，第一個辦法就是親自去問。但如果信息比較敏感，談判者可以注意他們表述的時候用的是第一人稱還是第三人稱。當提到特定話題時，他們是否有所反應？通過人們的行為模式來判斷還是很有用的。

????沃斯說，如果要關注所有這些額外信息，一個人的精力遠遠不夠用。他補充說：“五名普通的談判者組成談判代表團，相互協作，他們的表現會比一名超級談判專家還要優秀。”

????談判與你本人或你的情緒無關。采取強硬立場的同時要保持頭腦冷靜，做到這一點可能會很難，但卻很管用。

????譯者：李玫曉/汪皓

????Sometimes you have to play hardball in a business negotiation. Say your boss throws you in the ring to settle terms with a competitor or a difficult client. You've got to go into it like a boxer, right? Dominate, show you won't budge.

????Actually, experts say that the best negotiators get what they want without the aggression. Beyond the detrimental effects that aggression or anger can have on personal health and the health of the workplace, professional negotiators say those emotions can get in the way of getting what you want out of a discussion.

????One way or another, threatening or blaming someone during a negotiation will negatively influence the outcome, says Stuart Diamond, Wharton professor and author of a book on negotiation called Getting More.

????Something as subjective as a wounded ego can flub a negotiation. "People will refuse a deal even though it would have actually made them better off," says Chris Voss, an adjunct professor at Georgetown's McDonough business school and former kidnapping negotiator with the FBI. "If people feel like they've been treated unfairly, they actually get psychological satisfaction from punishing the other side."

????So it's best not to start a discussion in a way that would provoke those people, regardless of whether or not you agree with them. In fact, the success or failure of a discussion is hardly influenced by the substance of what's being discussed, says Diamond. Rather, the people involved -- with their goals, their baggage and the way they address each other -- influence a negotiation much more than the content.

????Solid negotiators can control the tenor of a discussion by making sure that the other side feels heard. It's a common misconception that you, the negotiator, are the most important person in the room, according to Diamond. Instead, negotiators should focus their energy on the person they are trying to convince. Even if their goals seem unreasonable, people will often offer up clues on how they are thinking.

????"I kind of believe that really good negotiators have a firm grip on the obvious," Diamond says. In high-pressure situations, it's easy to focus on achieving your own mission, not picking up on hints that you can glean from the other person's speech or behavior.

????Negotiations should serve as a kind of intelligence-gathering exercise, says Voss, who picked that up during his time with the FBI. He now advises businesses on negotiation via his firm Black Swan. Even in a business discussion, much more is happening than it would seem on the surface. For example, third parties often affect discussions. In the corporate world, it's important to know whether bosses or CEOs wield power over the people discussing terms. There are a couple of ways to key in on this; the first, of course, is to ask them. But if the information is sensitive, negotiators can pay attention to whether people speak in first person or third person. Do they react when certain subjects are mentioned? Behavioral patterns can be useful.

????But being open to all of this extra information can require more than one person, says Voss. "If you give me five mediocre negotiators but they work as a team, they can perform better than one superstar," he adds.

????Negotiation isn't about you or your emotions. It may be more difficult, but it pays to keep a cool head while playing hardball.